So, it's been a while and I have unsuccessfully posted anything beyond my first post in over 5 months. But here I am again. I am not in the habit of doing this (obviously) but today, I had a thought. I, along with my boyfriend, have started walking in the morning. We both want to get healthier. I want to lose weight too. And as a large woman, I have huge obstacles to overcome.
I am not, nor will I ever be, a supermodel. I will always be on the bigger side of life, and that is okay. I just want to feel good. Right now, my body aches and I believe most of that is due to my weight and my lack of exercise. Now that I am walking and stretching, I have to deal with the thoughts that come along with it.
You know the ones. The ones that tell you that you can't do it or that you will not lose weight. The vain ones that focus on the superficial and not the reality. Of course I want people to tell me that I am pretty or beautiful. Of course I want to hold my head high in the knowledge that I don't look like a blob bouncing and jiggling down the street. But I want to be healthy.
My boyfriend and I have plans - places to go and things to see. But we need to be able to enjoy it without struggling to breath or just wanting to go to bed early. He is a great guy that I am so happy to have in my life. I want him to have a wonderful life and I want to be a part of that. I can't if I can't keep up.
So here I go. Onward through the obstacles. Past the negative voices in my head. And I have to believe that I have the stamina and endurance to get past the worst of it. It will not be easy. My body is not used to exercise, but I have to do it if I want to reach my goals.
